2014 is officially over and it’s time to kick off a new year! New Years is one of the best times of the year because this is when everyone gets a fresh start and a chance to make the most out of the next twelve months. I love looking back on the year to see how I’ve grown and to start looking towards all that I want to accomplish in the upcoming year.
There is really nothing special about December 31st. It’s just another day like all of the others, but it always brings with it that feeling of another chance to either finish something you didn’t get to complete or start something you never got around to over the year. New Year’s Eve is all about new beginnings and new experiences and this year I am super excited for both.
For many years with my eating disorder (ED), New Year’s never felt like the beginning to a fresh start or a time where I could improve on myself. It was just another day where I felt like I was trapped in one place with my eating disorder and it was hard to focus on anything else. Even with the promise of a new year, everything ahead was centered on obsessing and worrying about calories and food.
When you’re in the middle of an eating disorder or just starting out in recovery, it feels like you are attempting to learn another language. The idea of relearning positive eating behaviors and seeing yourself in a positive light is completely foreign and unnatural. All I could see for the New Year was more of the same and I couldn’t see past the hold of my eating disorder to push past it all and view the New Year as something to look forward to.
I started my recovery around New Years a few years ago and I felt like I had nowhere to look for direction. I was meeting with therapists and nutritionists and I had the support of family and friends, but despite their guidance, I still felt lost. It seemed a lot easier to sink back into old destructive habits that were comfortable than to branch out into this new world of recovery outside of my eating disorder. After months of small improvements in the right direction, it all started to feel more normal. Taking care of me and doing it the right way started to feel natural. It all started coming together and pretty soon the New Year brought with it the promise of knowing how to love myself again.
So what will you do with this promise of a new year and how do you plan to take the first step? It’s pretty common to make the annual list of “Resolutions”, “To Do’s” and “Self Improvements” for the upcoming year. This time of the year forces most of us to stop looking in the past and start concentrating on what’s ahead. Whether it’s your physical or emotional health that you want to improve on or relationship or life goals to work towards…we all have the promise of the New Year to make it happen.
The one thing that I have learned from my recovery is that it’s always best to take baby steps. It wasn’t until I took the pressure off of myself and started working towards little improvements that I started seeing progress. Many of you might be planning your New Year’s resolutions around your eating disorder or plans for recovery. That was definitely the center of mine the last few years. This year, thankfully, I’m trying to look past all of that and work towards a new set of goals that aren’t ED related. It feels good to look ahead for all that is out there for me without being held back from the lies of my eating disorder.
No matter where you are with your eating disorder or what your New Year’s resolutions are, here are some tips to help you get started in making baby steps towards a new beginning and a new you:
- Make monthly goals: Have something small to work towards each month that will lead you in the right direction. Make it manageable and something that is realistic. For me, during my eating disorder, one of my monthly goals was to branch outside of my safe foods list and try one or two dishes that I was scared of eating.
- Stay positive: This one seems obvious, but it can be one of the hardest things to do. Having a positive mindset is one of the greatest ways to help you keep working towards your goals. During my recovery, I wrote notes of affirmation around my room and on my bathroom mirror. Most of the time, I was my own worst enemy with all of the negative thoughts constantly going through my head. Remember that a positive outlook usually starts with your own self-talk and a positive thought life. If this sort of thinking doesn’t come naturally, the notes will be good reminders to love yourself and keep things positive!
- Realize you’re going to mess up: You are not going to do things perfectly every time. If you mess up, you have to know that it is okay. Take each mistake as a way to learn and grow from it. Be as kind and forgiving to yourself as you would to someone you love! Give yourself a break! Realize that you’re only human and messing up once isn’t the set up to continuing the same mistakes…learn from them and move on and try to improve the next day.
- Imagine yourself reaching your goal: Always keep your end goal in mind. Imagine looking back and seeing the improvement and hard work that went into accomplishing the goal. When things get tough, picture the finish line and keep going!
- Keep moving forward: There are going to be many times when you feel like you can’t keep going, but have your goal in sight. Never give up no matter what comes your way. Anyone can make lists, but goals are only accomplished when you turn your list into actions!
My ED-Free New Year’s Resolutions 2015:
- Be more spontaneous.
- Give thanks in all circumstances.
- Surround myself with positive people
- Have patience and stay positive.
- Work on being more selfless.
One of the main road blocks to accomplishing your goals will always be fear. Don’t let the fear of trying something new keep you from working towards a better you. No matter what your resolutions are, try to take everything one step at a time and keep moving forward. Here is to all things new, a fresh start and a happy and healthy 2015!