Blog – re-modelED

Triggers

June 1, 2014

Triggers are a stimulus that causes a reaction. They can create insecurity, low self-esteem, shame, panic attacks, negative body image, and stress, which in turn, cause us to react. Triggers can pull out bad habits and addictive behaviors in all of us. In my life, triggers always seemed to conjure up some type of food related response. When I think about it, reacting to circumstances in a negative way with food is not controlling the situation, it’s controlling me.

When feelings of low self-esteem, stress, and shame start to surface inside of you and you want to react to triggers, ask yourself,

Do the circumstances around me have to control the way I view myself?
Is my reaction to the trigger helpful or harmful to myself?
If someone else were in my place, how would I suggest they react?

Responding to triggers in a negative way is really just learned behavior. It can become an easy habit to connect the trigger with the reaction. Find some new ways to cope with your triggers. Go for a walk or call a good friend and talk through how you feel. It might take some time to retrain your brain when you encounter a trigger. Remember the hardest part is identifying a trigger and replacing the negative thoughts with positive ones instead of reacting in a way that is destructive.

Blog, Health & Recovery

The Girl in the Mirror

April 11, 2014

As a kid, when I used to look in the mirror, I saw me as me. I saw a quiet, timid girl who was a stickler for rules, but was also eager for adventure and fun. As I grew older, this reflection in the mirror slowly began to change. All I began to see were the imperfections, the things I needed to fix and modify about myself. By the time I was a teenager, this image of myself started to focus more on my physical self and continued to transform until I only saw a body with no person attached…just an imperfect body that needed to be fixed.

This body I saw was morphed and almost blurry. I couldn’t see what was really there. All I knew was that whatever was there, it needed to be altered. This is a very common struggle for those with eating disorders (ED), and although they might not be as extreme, these types of thoughts have entered everyone’s head at some point in time.

We are so harsh on our bodies; we criticize, hate, and pick out every little part that isn’t good enough in our eyes. The constant disapproval of my body eventually turned into me not even being able to see what I actually looked like because my perception of myself was so twisted. When I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t tell what was big or what was small. What the scale and measuring tape said, completely contradicted what my eyes were telling me. Over the past several months, I’ve finally gotten to the point in my recovery where I am beginning to accept and love my body for what it is.

I saw a Dove commercial recently that really made me think. Women were asked to describe their features behind a curtain while an artist blindly sketched them only from hearing the descriptions they gave him of themselves. Then others were asked to describe the same women while the artist sketched another version based on their description of the way they perceived those women. Then, the two drawings of each woman were compared to one another. The drawings were both drastically different. The sketch based on the women’s description of themselves were mainly only focused on what they saw as negative features, while the other sketch based on the description from others showed the women’s true beauty. After the women saw their drawings, the artist asked, ‘Do you think you are more beautiful than you see?” This really put things into perspective for how we view ourselves and how it impacts everything around us.

Dove Real Beauty Sketches

But why are we so critical of our appearance? Why is it so hard to love ourselves and our bodies? We all strive to reach some form of, what we think of, perfection and acceptance; but as cheesy and cliché as this might sound, we need to realize that our bodies are perfect the way they are. Our physical appearance should not be what solely defines us. Start making small efforts to accept yourself completely; begin complimenting yourself, even if you don’t believe it at first. As you learn to love yourself and your body, your reflection in the mirror will begin to show the real, beautiful you.

Blog, Recipes, Snacks

Baked Sweet Potato and Beet Chips

March 22, 2014

Sweet Potato Chips:

2-3 medium sweet potatoes
3 TB coconut oil
Pink Himalayan salt
Cinnamon

Slice sweet potatoes in spiralizer (use the widest blade). You can also use a knife and finely chop sweet potatoes if you don’t have a spiralizer, but make sure they are cut in very thin slices. Melt the coconut oil and toss with the sweet potatoes then sprinkle with cinnamon and Himalayan salt.

We also mixed in purple potatoes as well and tossed them with olive oil along with salt and pepper.

Bake at 250 for at least an hour or until crisp (it may take up to 2 hours)

Beet Chips:

2-3 medium beets
2 golden beets
Agave
Red wine

Slice beets in spiralizer or finely slice. Boil the golden beets first in water with a dash of agave until the beets become a little translucent. Take out the golden beets and boil the regular beets in the water with red wine. Drain the liquid and dry the beets. Bake on 250 for at least an hour or until crisp. (it may take up to 2 hours)

Blog, Health & Recovery

Stress: What Are You Going To Do With It?

March 12, 2014

Who isn’t under stress today? Whether it is school, work, family, friendships, or just life stresses, everyone has stress at some point. It’s not IF we are going to have to handle stress but it should be HOW are we going to handle stress when it happens.

Lately, I’ve been very stressed out with college. I went to an online high school in Pennsylvania 10th grade through 12th so I could travel with my modeling. In 9th grade, I went to a liberal arts magnet school in Georgia and before that I was home-schooled through middle school. I haven’t had a lot of years in a class room. It was very difficult trying to keep up with all of my school work while I was modeling and sometimes working 12 to 13 hour days shooting and going to castings. I graduated in May from my online school and started college this semester after returning home from modeling. I have always put a lot of pressure on myself to be “perfect” in everything I do and school is no different. College is new to me and with it brings a lot of new stress that I’m learning to deal with like everyone has to when they first start school.

Lately I have been reading about the effects of stress on the physical body and it’s crazy what it can do to us. Stress suppresses our immune system, can cause problems with breathing, heart rate, and can mess up our sleep. Everyone handles stress differently: some people eat a lot when they are under stress, some handle it better alone and don’t want to be around other people, some might get irritable, and some might not even respond to stress. We all react to it in different ways.

With my eating disorder (ED), the first thing that ED wants me to think is that ED is back in control. I questioned it a few times when those same self-defeating thoughts came back along with the stress. I was starting to think that I couldn’t handle school without ED and giving into that way of thinking, but I started to realize that I was giving ED way too much credit.

I’ve come a long way with my eating disorder and I know that I am stronger than ED. Recovery is not easy; I’m going to slip every now and then and give in to those ED thoughts. There will be times where I feel out of control and I’m going to give in to ED’s lies. But that’s the thing… they are LIES.

For me, giving in to ED and going backwards after all of the hard work I’ve put into my recovery is not going to happen. I’m not going to let stress allow ED to control my mind. ED feeds off of stress and loves to make me feel like I need ED’s “help” to deal with it all. That’s not true.

Handling stress all starts with our thoughts. In therapy, we talked about how eating disorders relate back to how we think. Everyone has conversations with themselves in their head every day. These conversations are either positive or negative. These past few weeks, ED was starting to feed me negative lies and for a while I was almost beginning to believe them again; but I’m not going to continue to give ED that much credit. I started taking every thought captive and replacing each of ED’s lies with the truth about me. It’s up to us to know how to respond to the negative thoughts ED feeds us; we can react and believe them or we can see them for what they are – LIES – and try to replace them with positive thoughts and truths.

This is much easier said than done and it takes a while to get to this point in recovery. I know this sounds cheesy, but start by saying something positive to yourself in the mirror in the morning. When I first started my recovery, I had a saying on my bathroom mirror that I would repeat over and over in my head: “I accept myself unconditionally right now.” Try repeating this to yourself; write it down and put it in your car or on your mirror…wherever you need to. Everyone deals with stress and handles it differently. When you feel stressed, weak and out of control, think about the lies ED is telling you and combat that with what you know is the truth. You are strong and you don’t need to listen to ED’s lies.

Stress is going to happen….What are you going to do with it?

Blog, Recipes, Snacks

Fruit & Nut Bars

March 10, 2014

Cashew Fig Bars

1/2 cup pitted dates
1/3 cup cashews (roasted or raw)
1/3 cup of dried figs
2 TB coconut oil
pinch of salt

Blend cashew and fig mixture until forms into dough in a food processor. Roll out the dough flat and then cut into bars. Store in refrigerator.

Pistachio Raspberry Bars

1/2 cup pitted dates
1/3 cup pistachios (raw or roasted)
1/4 cup fresh rasberries
pinch of salt

Blend pistachio and raspberry mixture until forms into dough in a food processor. Roll out the dough flat and then cut into bars. Store in refrigerator.

Blog, Recipes, Snacks

Smoothies

February 19, 2014

One of my favorite things to make are smoothies. Simple is always best and most of my smoothies start with a quick and easy base made up of three tasty and nutritious ingredients: coconut milk, banana, and spinach.

It’s easy to change up your smoothies by adding in different ingredients to the base to make a completely new creation every time. Check out some of my favorite smoothie recipes below.

Here are a few of my favorite smoothies:

This is my go to smoothie: Tropical Green Smoothie

1 frozen banana
1/2 cup frozen mango
1/2 cup frozen pineapple
2/3 cup coconut milk
1 cup spinach
1/2 cup water

Blend ingredients. I love to put flax seeds, chia seeds, or goji berries on top

Strawberry Banana Smoothie:

1 frozen banana
1/2 cup frozen strawberries
3/4 cup coconut milk
1 cup spinach (optional)
1/2 cup water
1/2 TB maca powder

Blend then sprinkle cacao nibs and flax seeds on top

Pineapple Mango Smoothie

1 cup of mango
1/2 cup of pineapple juice
1/2 cup of coconut milk
1 cup of spinach (optional)
1/2 cup of water
1 tsp maca powder

Blend then top with goji berries

My favorite healthy dessert smoothie: Banana Coconut Smoothie

1 1/2 frozen banana
2 TB coconut cream
2/3 cup coconut milk
1/2 cup water
1/2 TB maca powder
2 TB coconut palm sugar

Blend then top with cacao nibs and flax seeds

Blog, Health & Recovery

Dear Me…A letter to my fifteen-year-old self

February 7, 2014

It’s the year 2010, and your life is about to change. You’ve been back and forth to New York for your modeling and you are now settling in to the city for your first extended stay as a model with one of the top agencies in the world. I know how excited and nervous you are right now for all that is ahead of you. Your modeling career is off to an unbelievable start meeting with famous designers and international magazines. It’s just the beginning, and it feels like you have the world at your fingertips.

New York 2010

The last few months leading up to this trip, you’ve been skipping meals and over- exercising, but please listen to me when I say that you are putting too much pressure on yourself to lose weight. You’re taking it to the extreme and setting yourself up to be miserable. Soon you’ll start to feel trapped in a destructive cycle of shame, fear and self-hatred. What might feel good right now will regrettably leave you feeling hopeless and alone.

Today, I want to warn you especially – you will have an important decision to make very soon, one that can change your life drastically. It won’t really seem like a big deal at the time but will mark the start of your eating disorder that will consume your life for the next few years. For the first time, you will start to hear your eating disorder (ED) whispering in your ear. Don’t listen.

I wish you could know now what’s taken years to learn the hard way. Love yourself as I do now.

From,

“Future You”

Blog, Recipes, Snacks

Granola

January 10, 2014

Granola has been one of my favorite snacks since I was little and we always had it around the house when I was growing up. The base for the granola is really simple; you can change it up and add any of your favorite dried fruits, chocolate, nuts, and seeds that you like. Granola is such a great on-the-go snack and its absolutely delicious. I made this granola a few days ago for a hike in the North Georgia mountains!

Here are a few pictures from our hike:

Vegan Granola:

2 cups of oats
1/3 cup chopped hazelnuts
1/3 cup chopped almonds
1/2 cup dried cranberries
1/4 cup flax seeds
1/4 cup shredded coconut
1/4 cup maple syrup (you can use equal part honey instead of maple syrup if you’d like)
3 TB melted coconut oil

Mix ingredients and bake in oven on 300 for 10-15 minutes. Let the granola cool then add chopped dark chocolate.

Blog, Dessert, Recipes

Dark Chocolate, Coconut, Macadamia Nut Tart

December 9, 2013

This is one of my new favorite desserts and I’m definitely going to be making this again for Christmas.

Here is the recipe

For the crust:

1/2 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
2 TB coconut oil, melted
1 1/2 cups almond flour (you can make your own by grinding almonds in a food processor until its the consistency of flour)
2 TB maple syrup
1/4 tsp salt

For the ganache:

1 cup canned coconut milk
12 oz. of dark chocolate (min 70% cocao)
1 tsp vanilla extract

For the top:

1/2 cup chopped macadamia nuts
1/2 cup unsweetened coconut flakes
A sprinkle of pink Himalayan sea salt

How to make the crust:

Turn oven to 350 degrees. Blend almond flour, salt and shredded coconut in food processor until ground. Melt the coconut oil, and then add along with the maple syrup to almond flour and coconut mixture. Blend until it turns into dough.

Spread the dough in a greased tart pan with a removable bottom. Make sure the dough is even in the pan (you can use your fingers or something like a measuring cup to flatten it)

Bake in the center of the oven for about 12-16 minutes then let it cool for at least an hour.

How to make the ganache:

Finely chop the dark chocolate and place in a bowl. Bring coconut milk to a boil in a saucepan then pour hot coconut milk in the bowl with the chocolate and let stand for one minute without stirring. Then stir until smooth and creamy and add vanilla.

How to make the toppings:

You can either roast the macadamia nuts and coconut in the oven on a baking sheet for 3-5 min or roast on top of the stove until golden brown (be careful because they burn very easily)

Pour chocolate mixture in the cooled crust. Then sprinkle toasted macadamia nuts and toasted coconut on top with a little Himalayan sea salt. Chill for at least one hour in the refrigerator to let it set before eating.

Blog, Dessert, Recipes

Pumpkin Trifle

December 1, 2013

My family always goes all out on holidays. We always end up making enough food to feed an army and our leftovers usually last us at least a few days. This year I made a pumpkin pie from Chocolate Covered Katie (http://chocolatecoveredkatie.com/) and it was delicious! For almost every special occasion, my grandmother makes chocolate trifle which is a family favorite. She layers brownies, whipped cream, chocolate pudding or custard, and either crumbled heath bars or nuts in a beautiful dish. This year, we had a lot of leftovers, so I thought why not make a trifle with the pumpkin pie we had left! This recipe is delicious and so easy to make 🙂

Here is the recipe

I didn’t use the crust in the pumpkin pie just the pie filling 🙂

For the pie filling:

1 can organic pumpkin
1/4 cup rolled oats
1 can full-fat coconut milk
2 tbsp ground flax
½ cup coconut sugar
2 tsp cinnamon
2 tsp pumpkin pie spice
1/2 tsp salt
1 tbsp pure vanilla extract

Turn on oven to 400 degrees. Blend all ingredients together (I used my blender) then pour into greased pie pan and bake 25-30 minute then let cool. Put in refrigerator for several hours to let the pie set.

For the whipped coconut cream:

1 cup of coconut cream or full fat coconut milk

3 TB of coconut sugar

Put the can of coconut cream in the refrigerator overnight until it hardens, then put the solid coconut cream in a bowl.Don’t use the liquids at the bottom of the can, but would be great to drink (coconut water). Add coconut sugar to creamed coconut and blend together with an electric mixer until its whipped like whipped cream. Keep in refrigerator. You can use the leftover whipped cream in smoothies or eat with fruit 🙂

For the candied pecans:

Toss 1 cup of pecans with 1 TB melted coconut oil and 3 TB coconut sugar. Put in a pan and cook on low-medium heat stirring for around 5 minutes (these can burn very easily).

Layer the pumpkin pie and whipped coconut cream in a dish then top with the candied pecans and sprinkle coconut sugar on top.

I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving 🙂

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